THE SYNTHROID SONG by Perry Ross
(sung to the tune of ‘Home on the Range’)
Oh give me a jab,
send the tubes to the lab,
The results will come back then we’ll see,
The numbers will show,
All that we need to know,
Oh I so hope that they all will be
(chorus)
In The Normal Range,
Though my symptoms are not better yet,
My throat’s got a frog,
and my brain’s in a fog,
But my doctor just bought a Corvette.
(chorus)
Oh please let me be,
Where the labs all agree,
Oh yes, that is where I wish to dwell,
My doc says to stick,
with the arithmetic,
And don’t worry about whether I’m well.
(chorus)
In The Normal Range,
Not over, nor under a bit
Your numbers are fine,
so it’s all in your mind,
Even though you’re still feeling like shcrap.